1 00:01:06,990 --> 00:01:09,510 And with that, I will pronounce you husband and wife. 2 00:01:09,930 --> 00:01:13,770 You will kiss the bride, and half your guests will be blubbering, and that'll 3 00:01:13,770 --> 00:01:14,770 that. 4 00:01:14,970 --> 00:01:18,070 Listen, thanks a million for everything, Reverend. You've been great. 5 00:01:18,290 --> 00:01:21,450 My pleasure. Thanks for me, too. I really appreciate everything you've 6 00:01:21,790 --> 00:01:26,230 Uh, Mr. Devane, we can take care of that tomorrow night. Okay. 7 00:01:27,190 --> 00:01:30,010 Good night, Reverend. Good night. 8 00:01:30,650 --> 00:01:32,430 And I'll see you all tomorrow night. 9 00:01:36,330 --> 00:01:37,570 Remember, 7 o 'clock. 10 00:01:38,510 --> 00:01:39,510 I'll remember. 11 00:01:40,310 --> 00:01:41,950 Well, are you starting to get nervous? 12 00:01:42,610 --> 00:01:47,190 Yeah, a little. Not me. I'm just excited. I can't believe in 24 hours I'm 13 00:01:47,190 --> 00:01:48,190 to be Mr. 14 00:01:48,430 --> 00:01:49,430 Kirk Devane. 15 00:01:52,250 --> 00:01:55,650 I know it's a little premature, but I thought we should have some champagne to 16 00:01:55,650 --> 00:01:57,030 celebrate. Oh, hi, dog. 17 00:01:57,770 --> 00:01:58,770 Right. 18 00:01:59,310 --> 00:02:00,310 Here you go. 19 00:02:00,530 --> 00:02:02,710 This is the greatest night of my life. 20 00:02:02,950 --> 00:02:04,410 Dick, would you like to make the first toast? 21 00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:06,960 Uh, sure. 22 00:02:12,780 --> 00:02:15,020 To the bride and groom. 23 00:02:16,260 --> 00:02:23,240 Did I pick 24 00:02:23,240 --> 00:02:24,640 the right best man or what? 25 00:02:26,500 --> 00:02:31,040 Now I'd like to make a toast, but Dick's is going to be pretty hard to top. 26 00:02:32,860 --> 00:02:33,900 To Dick and Joanna. 27 00:02:34,570 --> 00:02:40,010 for allowing us to be married in their lovely home and for being our best man 28 00:02:40,010 --> 00:02:41,650 and matron of honor. Oh. 29 00:02:42,090 --> 00:02:46,910 To Stephanie and George for being our bridesmaid and our usher. 30 00:02:48,070 --> 00:02:53,790 And to Cindy whose goodness of spirit and joy of life have made me the 31 00:02:53,790 --> 00:02:54,790 man in the world. 32 00:02:55,110 --> 00:02:57,350 Oh. And to America. 33 00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:06,730 I'm not used to drinking champagne after amen, but... 34 00:03:06,730 --> 00:03:12,930 Now I'd like to make a toast to 35 00:03:12,930 --> 00:03:16,610 Cindy for asking me to be a part of all this. 36 00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,650 It's really an honor for me. 37 00:03:18,930 --> 00:03:21,510 I've always been a bride, never a bridesmaid. 38 00:03:22,570 --> 00:03:23,570 Stephanie, 39 00:03:25,370 --> 00:03:26,810 that was beautiful. 40 00:03:28,250 --> 00:03:31,630 You know, Kirk, I have to say, I've never known a man who was... 41 00:03:31,850 --> 00:03:32,910 So happy about getting married. 42 00:03:33,110 --> 00:03:34,130 I can't help it, Dick. 43 00:03:34,430 --> 00:03:36,870 Nobody knows how long I've dreamed about this. 44 00:03:37,410 --> 00:03:40,850 And the amazing thing is everything is turning out exactly as I hoped it would. 45 00:03:40,950 --> 00:03:45,870 I'm having a beautiful wedding in a beautiful place with beautiful people. 46 00:03:47,090 --> 00:03:49,470 I love each and every one of you. 47 00:03:50,270 --> 00:03:51,270 Oh. Oh. 48 00:03:51,470 --> 00:03:52,470 Oh. Oh. 49 00:03:54,770 --> 00:03:57,490 Honey, honey, I think that's enough champagne. 50 00:03:59,820 --> 00:04:02,020 So, what's everybody going to be doing tomorrow before the wedding? 51 00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:05,520 Well, Kirk, I think we're all going to be busy getting everything ready. Oh, 52 00:04:05,580 --> 00:04:08,880 right. Why? What are you going to be doing? I don't know. In the morning, I 53 00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:12,060 think I'll get a haircut, and in the afternoon, I thought maybe I'd go down 54 00:04:12,060 --> 00:04:13,120 bowl a few games. 55 00:04:14,380 --> 00:04:15,680 If that's okay with you. 56 00:04:16,220 --> 00:04:17,399 Whatever you want, honey. 57 00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:18,600 It's your day. 58 00:04:33,740 --> 00:04:35,140 This is my other brother, Daryl. 59 00:04:37,560 --> 00:04:40,820 Are you here for the wedding or the septic tank? 60 00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:46,440 The invitation said the wedding. Oh, fine. Would you like to sign the guest 61 00:04:46,440 --> 00:04:47,440 book? Sure. 62 00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:08,920 you to your seat. 63 00:05:08,940 --> 00:05:09,940 Thank you. 64 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:14,640 Maybe during the reception we can take a look at that septic tank. 65 00:05:21,720 --> 00:05:23,980 Kurt, can you please stand still? I'm sorry. 66 00:05:24,280 --> 00:05:27,440 I'm excited, Dick. This is the happiest moment of my life. 67 00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:28,860 I have to tell you something. 68 00:05:29,240 --> 00:05:33,380 Can you tell me facing the other way? I have to get this tie fastened. 69 00:05:34,140 --> 00:05:36,640 I wasn't sure I was ever going to meet anyone who... 70 00:05:36,940 --> 00:05:38,960 cared enough about me to go through all this. 71 00:05:39,160 --> 00:05:40,580 Well, Cindy loves you very much. 72 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:42,160 I meant you. 73 00:05:44,280 --> 00:05:45,280 Oh. 74 00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:46,480 Thanks for everything. 75 00:05:47,100 --> 00:05:49,420 You, uh, you aren't gonna hug me again, are you? 76 00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:53,860 What do you think? 77 00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:56,660 You look absolutely stunning. 78 00:05:57,060 --> 00:06:00,380 You should see yourself. I did, in the refrigerator. 79 00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:02,060 I look squatty. 80 00:06:08,940 --> 00:06:11,880 It's hard not to be a little overwhelmed by everything that's about to happen. 81 00:06:12,340 --> 00:06:13,940 I mean, marriage is permanent. 82 00:06:14,380 --> 00:06:15,460 No, it isn't. 83 00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:23,720 Guys, it really isn't bad at all. I'm really glad I'm getting married. 84 00:06:24,180 --> 00:06:29,360 It's just I hope I don't mess up my vows or do anything to embarrass Kirk. 85 00:06:30,540 --> 00:06:35,280 I just love him so much, and this day is so important to him. 86 00:06:35,680 --> 00:06:37,480 I just want everything to be perfect. 87 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:42,400 I'd just like to take a moment before the ceremony to say a few words to the 88 00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:43,400 groom. 89 00:06:43,440 --> 00:06:44,820 You want to know if I'm chaste? 90 00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:50,860 No, it has nothing to do with that. Because if you do, I can get witnesses 91 00:06:50,860 --> 00:06:51,860 prove that I am. 92 00:06:56,420 --> 00:06:59,420 Kirk, why don't you just let Reverend Miller say what he has to say? 93 00:07:00,140 --> 00:07:05,140 I want you to pay particular attention to the vows that you're about to take. 94 00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:06,300 Why? 95 00:07:06,390 --> 00:07:10,010 Because many times people think of them as just words, and they're so much more 96 00:07:10,010 --> 00:07:13,530 than just words. They're a commitment, a contract for life. 97 00:07:14,790 --> 00:07:15,709 They are. 98 00:07:15,710 --> 00:07:18,990 Yes. You are about to take a very big step. 99 00:07:19,930 --> 00:07:24,350 You are making a promise before God to love, honor, and stand by this person, 100 00:07:24,350 --> 00:07:26,930 matter what, for the rest of your life. 101 00:07:31,590 --> 00:07:32,590 Boy. 102 00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:35,820 Kirk, it's more fun than that. 103 00:07:39,240 --> 00:07:42,800 Well, no word from the governor, so I guess it's a go. 104 00:07:48,600 --> 00:07:50,800 Well, a joyful moment has arrived. 105 00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:53,260 I'll see you in the lobby. Excuse me. 106 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:55,800 Is it hot in here? 107 00:07:56,040 --> 00:07:58,020 No, Kirk, you're just a little nervous. 108 00:07:58,280 --> 00:08:01,930 Well... I'm sure you'll feel better once you're out there enjoying the happiest 109 00:08:01,930 --> 00:08:03,030 moment of your life. 110 00:08:03,770 --> 00:08:04,770 Right. 111 00:09:09,610 --> 00:09:10,610 I love you. 112 00:09:39,720 --> 00:09:40,720 Can we get our puppy now? 113 00:09:46,020 --> 00:09:49,440 Yeah, he's fine. Cindy just called from the hospital and they're on their way 114 00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:50,440 home right now. 115 00:09:51,100 --> 00:09:52,100 It was a shame. 116 00:09:53,640 --> 00:09:56,340 Oh, thank you. We thought the place would look lovely, too. 117 00:09:57,760 --> 00:09:59,640 We got them from Sweeney's Flores. 118 00:10:01,340 --> 00:10:04,480 Oh, those are little crackers that are made from cream cheese. 119 00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:09,400 Well, I'm sure she'd be glad to give you the recipe. 120 00:10:10,280 --> 00:10:13,280 Well, listen, thank you for calling, and thank you and your brothers for fixing 121 00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:14,280 the septic tank. 122 00:10:18,740 --> 00:10:19,740 Good night. 123 00:10:20,100 --> 00:10:22,140 That Larry is a class guy. 124 00:10:22,920 --> 00:10:26,320 I can't help it. I still feel badly for Kurt. 125 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:30,920 Yeah, it's just such a shame this had to happen after all of this work and 126 00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:31,920 effort and worry. 127 00:10:32,260 --> 00:10:34,560 I doubt if my hair will ever turn out this well again. 128 00:10:42,890 --> 00:10:43,890 Like a fool? 129 00:10:43,910 --> 00:10:45,830 Oh, Kirk, can we get you anything? 130 00:10:46,310 --> 00:10:49,510 No. I'll have some coffee and maybe one of those little eclairs. 131 00:10:49,770 --> 00:10:51,710 Oh, why don't you make coffee for all of us? 132 00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:55,330 Oh, I see. It was a trick. 133 00:11:00,530 --> 00:11:04,010 This was supposed to be the happiest night of my life. Now it's the most 134 00:11:04,010 --> 00:11:07,490 humiliating. Would somebody talk to him, please? I can't get through to him. 135 00:11:08,890 --> 00:11:09,890 Look, uh... 136 00:11:12,750 --> 00:11:14,750 I know how you feel. Have you ever fainted? 137 00:11:14,990 --> 00:11:15,869 Well, no. 138 00:11:15,870 --> 00:11:17,090 Then you don't know how I feel. 139 00:11:17,570 --> 00:11:24,530 Well, I don't know how it feels to faint, but I know how it feels to be a 140 00:11:27,410 --> 00:11:30,090 Look, the point is you have to get past this. 141 00:11:30,610 --> 00:11:37,550 If you want, we'll do the whole thing again, and next 142 00:11:37,550 --> 00:11:38,590 time you'll be fine. 143 00:11:38,830 --> 00:11:39,890 How can we do this again? 144 00:11:40,560 --> 00:11:43,000 We can't afford to pay for more flowers and decorations. 145 00:11:43,380 --> 00:11:46,660 Well, we'll just put everything on ice. We haven't thrown anything away. 146 00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:51,520 You know, maybe we should just go to a justice of the peace and have a nice, 147 00:11:51,540 --> 00:11:52,600 simple little ceremony. 148 00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:53,880 Just you and me. 149 00:11:54,100 --> 00:11:55,820 But I want to get married like we planned. 150 00:11:56,900 --> 00:11:58,040 I just don't want to faint. 151 00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:01,720 Well, I'm sure you won't. It's possible. I come from a family of fainters. 152 00:12:02,780 --> 00:12:04,620 Actually, just the men. The women are bulldogs. 153 00:12:06,500 --> 00:12:07,960 Look, Kirk, when... 154 00:12:08,380 --> 00:12:11,800 And Joanne and I were married. I mean, I was nervous, too. The only thing that 155 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:14,660 got me through it was that I tried to think about something else. 156 00:12:14,860 --> 00:12:19,800 Whenever I get overwrought, I always just try to clear my head and think 157 00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:20,800 nothing. 158 00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:23,180 You must be the calmest man in the world. 159 00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:26,840 Well, I'd like to think so. 160 00:12:28,040 --> 00:12:32,260 Look, if you all don't mind, I think I'd like to try this again next Saturday. 161 00:12:32,460 --> 00:12:33,580 Of course we don't mind. 162 00:12:34,580 --> 00:12:35,840 I'll have to check my calendar. 163 00:12:37,900 --> 00:12:39,260 Of course we'll do it Saturday. 164 00:12:50,840 --> 00:12:51,840 Excuse me. 165 00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:53,760 Is there a table for the wedding presents? 166 00:12:54,180 --> 00:12:56,760 Well, not really, but if you've got something, I can take it. 167 00:13:02,860 --> 00:13:03,860 What is it? 168 00:13:04,760 --> 00:13:06,920 Just something that guarantees male children. 169 00:13:11,369 --> 00:13:12,369 Excuse me. 170 00:13:15,270 --> 00:13:18,890 Hello, welcome. Would you like to sign our guest book? Yes, I would. 171 00:13:21,750 --> 00:13:24,330 Are you here for the bride or the groom? 172 00:13:25,050 --> 00:13:26,370 We're here for the weekend. 173 00:13:28,230 --> 00:13:30,370 What? We have reservations. 174 00:13:30,730 --> 00:13:33,670 Oh, you're checking in. Oh, gee, we're right in the middle of a wedding right 175 00:13:33,670 --> 00:13:34,670 now. 176 00:13:34,990 --> 00:13:38,730 Why don't you have a seat and I'll go get your luggage and then we check in 177 00:13:38,730 --> 00:13:39,730 this is over. 178 00:13:39,810 --> 00:13:42,010 Who's getting married? The bride and groom. 179 00:13:56,570 --> 00:13:58,570 Well, how's that? 180 00:13:58,870 --> 00:13:59,870 Oh, Cindy. 181 00:14:00,550 --> 00:14:02,670 You get more beautiful with each wedding. 182 00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:06,840 How are you feeling? 183 00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:07,920 I feel fine. 184 00:14:08,220 --> 00:14:09,800 Does anybody know how Kirk is? 185 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:12,880 Well, I haven't seen him, but Dick said he's seen much better. Good. 186 00:14:13,580 --> 00:14:16,740 You know, Cindy, years from now, you and Kirk are going to look back on this and 187 00:14:16,740 --> 00:14:17,740 laugh. 188 00:14:18,080 --> 00:14:20,040 I just hope when we do, we're married. 189 00:14:25,340 --> 00:14:26,980 I just wanted you to know that we're ready. 190 00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:29,160 We'll be right out. 191 00:14:30,420 --> 00:14:31,420 George? 192 00:14:33,620 --> 00:14:34,720 What are those? 193 00:14:35,880 --> 00:14:37,720 Oh, come on, Dick. You know what these are. 194 00:14:39,820 --> 00:14:42,540 What are you doing with them? Oh, some people are checking in. 195 00:14:42,740 --> 00:14:45,460 Well, put them down and listen to this. What are we doing? Okay, I need your 196 00:14:45,460 --> 00:14:49,560 guys' help. Now, I think I'm going to be fine, but just in case I start to pass 197 00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:53,880 out, I want you guys to stop me. How? All right, I've worked this out. Dick, 198 00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:56,700 tonight I want you to grab my arm just like this. 199 00:14:57,020 --> 00:14:58,360 Okay? George, get over here. 200 00:14:59,480 --> 00:15:01,320 I want you to hold the smelling salts. 201 00:15:02,100 --> 00:15:03,100 This is stupid. 202 00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:05,540 It's not stupid if it keeps me standing up. 203 00:15:05,780 --> 00:15:08,120 Okay, now let's pretend I'm passing out. 204 00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:12,420 I start to go down, you jerk me up, and you hit me with a smelling salt. 205 00:15:12,760 --> 00:15:14,560 All right, let's just try it one time. 206 00:15:15,580 --> 00:15:16,580 Ready? 207 00:15:19,720 --> 00:15:20,920 Wow, okay, that works. 208 00:16:38,090 --> 00:16:39,170 What are you doing back there? 209 00:16:39,790 --> 00:16:40,790 Hating myself. 210 00:16:41,450 --> 00:16:43,150 Come on, please don't. 211 00:16:44,810 --> 00:16:46,490 You don't know the morning I've had. 212 00:16:47,510 --> 00:16:48,510 What happened? 213 00:16:48,910 --> 00:16:52,030 It's so over town that we can't get married because I keep fainting. 214 00:16:53,470 --> 00:16:56,550 I went into the bakery this morning to pick out our latest cake. 215 00:16:56,790 --> 00:17:00,930 Yeah? They asked me if I wanted the little groom standing next to the bride 216 00:17:00,930 --> 00:17:04,690 face down in the icing beside her. 217 00:17:08,650 --> 00:17:10,250 teasing. Well, it isn't funny to me. 218 00:17:11,230 --> 00:17:12,770 Listen, I've been sitting here thinking. 219 00:17:13,690 --> 00:17:15,569 Maybe you should try to find another guy. 220 00:17:16,030 --> 00:17:17,470 Kirk, don't be ridiculous. 221 00:17:17,910 --> 00:17:19,849 No, I mean it. You deserve better than me. 222 00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:24,410 You deserve a guy who can sweep you up in his arms, not fall into yours. 223 00:17:25,069 --> 00:17:30,770 Look, I know I've brought this up before, but why don't we try a civil 224 00:17:31,450 --> 00:17:33,630 You know, just the two of us at the courthouse. 225 00:17:34,010 --> 00:17:36,370 On those marble floors? Are you crazy? 226 00:17:42,120 --> 00:17:43,120 Why don't you just elope? 227 00:17:43,460 --> 00:17:46,680 Because I told you, this wedding is like a fantasy to me. 228 00:17:47,380 --> 00:17:49,880 The way we have it planned is the way I always wanted it. 229 00:17:50,300 --> 00:17:52,100 I'd like at least to give it one more shot. 230 00:17:53,460 --> 00:17:55,760 You really want to go through all this again on Saturday? 231 00:17:56,340 --> 00:18:01,660 Listen, I promise, if I faint this time, we'll try it your way. 232 00:18:03,140 --> 00:18:05,200 Do you think you can put the dress on one more time? 233 00:18:06,480 --> 00:18:10,000 Sure. How many girls get this much wear out of a wedding gown? 234 00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:33,400 We're going to try it again. 235 00:18:34,700 --> 00:18:37,120 This is the best turnout we've had yet. 236 00:18:41,160 --> 00:18:44,740 Dick, you have to promise me that no matter what happens, you're not going to 237 00:18:44,740 --> 00:18:45,780 let them take me to the hospital. 238 00:18:46,380 --> 00:18:47,640 I have to get married tonight. 239 00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:50,440 Kirk, I'm getting just as tired of this as you are. 240 00:18:51,540 --> 00:18:53,600 I guarantee you, you're getting married tonight. 241 00:18:55,260 --> 00:18:56,860 Dick, the doctor is here. 242 00:18:57,380 --> 00:18:58,380 What doctor? 243 00:18:58,700 --> 00:18:59,760 Hi, Dick. Hi, Doc. 244 00:19:05,330 --> 00:19:10,390 talk this over, but I thought that maybe this time it might not be a bad idea if 245 00:19:10,390 --> 00:19:13,890 a doctor was standing by. You think I'm going to faint again, don't you? Look at 246 00:19:13,890 --> 00:19:14,869 you. You're a wreck. 247 00:19:14,870 --> 00:19:16,430 You cut your shoulder shaving. 248 00:19:18,050 --> 00:19:21,490 You're more nervous than ever. Of course I'm nervous. I might be getting 249 00:19:21,490 --> 00:19:25,770 married. Kirk, I'm Dr. Perlow. The hospital filled me in on your situation. 250 00:19:25,770 --> 00:19:26,850 isn't really that unusual. 251 00:19:27,290 --> 00:19:28,610 You've been under a lot of stress. 252 00:19:29,490 --> 00:19:31,150 Is there anything you can do for me? 253 00:19:31,490 --> 00:19:33,490 Well, I might be able to help you get through the ceremony. 254 00:19:34,480 --> 00:19:37,520 If you could do that for me, I'd carry your golf clubs for the rest of your 255 00:19:37,520 --> 00:19:38,520 life. 256 00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:39,720 This was a good idea, Dick. 257 00:19:40,260 --> 00:19:42,060 Now, will you roll up your sleeve for me, please? 258 00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:43,760 Why? So I can give you this. 259 00:19:50,340 --> 00:19:51,340 What does that do? 260 00:19:52,100 --> 00:19:53,120 It relaxes you. 261 00:19:55,420 --> 00:19:56,420 I'll take it. 262 00:20:32,940 --> 00:20:33,960 That's what's going on. 263 00:21:06,410 --> 00:21:07,410 keep marching. 264 00:21:53,900 --> 00:21:57,760 here to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony, which is an honorable 265 00:21:57,760 --> 00:22:00,120 estate and should not be entered into lightly. 266 00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:05,960 Cindy Parker, do you take Kirk Devane to be your lawfully wedded husband, to 267 00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:10,800 have and to hold from this day forward, for richer and for poorer, in sickness 268 00:22:10,800 --> 00:22:14,040 and in health, for taking all others until death do you part? 269 00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:15,600 I do. 270 00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:16,800 I do too. 271 00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:25,040 Okay. 272 00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:31,780 May I have the ring, please? 273 00:22:35,100 --> 00:22:37,120 Would you put this on a finger? 274 00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:40,200 Dick, could you do it? I'm a little tied up. 275 00:22:44,780 --> 00:22:45,800 Repeat after me. 276 00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:49,120 With this ring, I be wed. With this ring, I be wed. 277 00:22:55,310 --> 00:22:56,310 I think he means me. 278 00:22:57,510 --> 00:22:58,510 I'm sorry. 279 00:22:59,650 --> 00:23:02,490 With this ring, I thee wed. 280 00:23:02,910 --> 00:23:07,310 By the power invested in me by the state of Vermont, I now pronounce that you 281 00:23:07,310 --> 00:23:09,110 are husband and wife, finally.